Tricycle as The Buddhist Enquirerer OR Why Clark Strand Must Change or Die

Strand's op piece is in the back of the Fall 2007 issue of Tricycle magazine [page 80], but gets a cover banner nod. Though the article is preposterous, the idea of the demise of Buddhism is titillating and might sell lots of copies at the newsstands.

In yet another one of his overblown, absurd attacks on Buddhism in Tricycle magazine, contributing editor Clark Strand, in the current issue, in an opinion piece titled "Dharma Family Values Or, Why American Buddhism must change or die", explains to us why American Buddhism must become Catholicism Lite or face a downward spiral toward oblivion. There just aren’t enough boring, meaningless rituals in Buddhism to rope the poor kiddies in. By the time they’re fourteen or fifteen, American kids leave our religion to take up the excitement of knitting or to memorize Gilbert and Sullivan show tunes. Yes, teenagers love to be bored and really hate excitement. We must make of Buddhism "that old-time religion," which was good enough for great-grandpa and is exactly what fourteen-year-olds crave.

Strand believes that rituals and tradition and chanting and marriages and burials and birthings, as well as prominent religious holidays, act as family-cohering events within a religion, something the Christians and Jews have in plenitude, while we stinting Buddhists have very little of that group-hug, dress-up bonding crap.

As part of his screed, Strand wrote this, with, from all evidence, a straight face and serious fingers,"In essence, the problem is this: Buddhism swelled its ranks during the post-1960 era to accommodate the spiritual interests of the baby boom generation that is even now beginning to die off, and yet those Boomer Buddhists, although they might finagle a way to get themselves married or buried as Buddhists, in most cases haven't birthed their children or raised them as Buddhists (or not effectively, at least). As a result, Buddhism in America will face a serious crisis over the next few decades, when it will be forced essentially to start over, bringing new Buddhists to the fold instead of making them."

The Fall 2007 issue of Tricycle.

It is curious to me why Strand would even want American Buddhism to survive. Over three years ago, in the Winter 2003-04 issue of Trike, he wrote, “When African Americans step into a Buddhist meditation center, that invisible culture is the first thing they see. They may be strong enough to participate in it without losing heart, or their racial identity, or both. Or they may be so strongly motivated to practice in that particular tradition that it just doesn't matter. In any event, they won't be kicked out for being black, because there are few outright bigots in the white Buddhist world. But the deeper racism, the passive racism committed to all the mannered nuances of its own culture – that is felt right away. No wonder most African Americans never make it through the door. There's no sign saying they can't come it. There doesn't have to be.”

Perhaps in the years between the two of his articles I’ve quoted, Stand has become a fully acclimated member of the racist cult of Buddhism and wants those white American Buddhist babies to be born, to be initiated and to grow up like their parents, put on the white hood and burn wheels (instead of crosses) on black families’ lawns. Yeah, if the white Buddhist population grows and prospers, we can wipe out the negro identity! Soon, all those black folk will be jiving like Britney Spears and singing like K-Fed.

Based on his record, here are some future articles mean-green Clark Strand can write for Tricycle:

"American Buddhists Chew the Heads off Baby Ducks because They Go Great with White Tea and Cheese Whiz."

"American Buddhists Stockpile Machetes for Genocide in Samoa"

"Michael Vick is Elected Head of the American Buddhist Conference because Buddhists Figure if He’s not Afraid to Gut Live Pit Bulls, Surely He can Stand Being Around Us”

and

“Buddhist Monks Must Poke Many Women to Spread the Buddhist Gene!”

Update: Recently, James Ure in the venerable The Buddhist Blog wrote a wonderful, thoughtful, kindly post, "Buddhism and Children," that is also critical of Strand's Trike article. Well worth reading, y'all. Too, it has a very interesting comment thread.